i was playing Luanti (a clone of Minecraft but open-source (if you wanna start a server which tries to roll ways of resource collection without destroying the landscape or altering it too much and tinker buildings that merge with the biome, hit me up)) and the back and forth of diving and returning to surface to get more oxygen to collect mangrove wood underwater put me into a serious tinker on how much i'm at the mercy of biology and how much i think i'm at the mercy of biology. not long ago on this day i went into the gastroenterologist and when going out of his room, out of sheer curiosity i asked what's the chance of my kids being celiac. 20% and i smiled saying being celiac isn't that bad on my opinion but i'm not having children anyways and since it was cold and i would not exercise if i reached parent's home, i took a walk from a area next to downtown, to downtown and then to an area out of downtown and wow! it's not even the weekend and there's a lot of people on bars. i saw a girl from the marketing school, wasn't sure but we sure looked at each other in distance for a while. she changed. i was thinking about other friend from that same university but now i don't know if it was before or after that. one of the bus stops has a long ramp that has no other entry so i just placed by body between the bars and lifted my legs to get into it as i was stepping a huge staircase. there was a guy behind me that looked suspicious and when he started walking faster i was ready to lose my camera. he went past my fugue route till the end of the ramp and went straight into me, we both got in the bus that just stopped. funny to think i would break up with everything for her. sometimes i wonder if we got together i wouldn't fall in place rather quickly. guess not even with a long legged hot blonde that is an indie game developer i would have an easy time if she didn't scored the basics like respecting animal rights and probably had her uterine tubes out. i still fear being able to want any adventure with babe-dunes-tripod (giovanna). part of me believe it wouldn't be a bad thing to start a family with her. part of me take serious loving her unconditionally and part of me, the very part of me that stopped my Minecraft game-play to write this, reminds the past and thinks lightly that it would be pointless to give up everything and this part of me that treats ideology as a suggestion starts to lighten stuff like what if i found a Scandinavia baddie on Tinder that i'll also feel the same openness and energy to give up from my mercy over biology because it feels i have no mercy even to myself these days. how much i wished life was just like the days i was starting qob and the night time was full of micro-breaks to look at the stars and the whole excitement of being naive on how much work is left and how cool people on gamedev. Discord communities were. 1 or 3 treated me kindly and i wasn't even aware how love works from within. if i'm aware of anything. i not only lost my mind but it also feels all i'm is dust which thinks how cool if this Minecraft world were also played by my children
photos of today's walk
and all i have on Minecraft... at least here i can eat bread and i wish i could play my very first world (+ 10 years ago, when Notch just released the first alpha version of the game back when it wasn't even famous). you spawned in a jungle, if you climbed the hill you would find my very rudimentary house made of wood logs that was actually the descent to my mines and going over the hill, my castle, my pyramids and by taking the mine-cart, you would travel to the sea side and find my sand house by the beach. i was younger than 13 years old and i still have a vivid spatial memory of that place. it was the game i decided to befriend with the nerds of my class. it abstracted me away as some type of drug and boy i had fun with those guys
the firefly isn't mine, i would feel bad capturing or killing animals virtually. would probably ban my own child if they started to kill cows and chickens. WHAT THE FUCK MIKE, YOU AIN'T EVEN PAYING ATTENTION TO THE VERTICAL FARMING PODCAST NOR RESPECTING THE RULES OF THE WORLD. GO TO YOUR BEDROOM AND DON'T EVEN MIND TO BOOT YOUR CYBERDECK!!!!!!!
photos of today's walk
and all i have on Minecraft... at least here i can eat bread and i wish i could play my very first world (+ 10 years ago, when Notch just released the first alpha version of the game back when it wasn't even famous). you spawned in a jungle, if you climbed the hill you would find my very rudimentary house made of wood logs that was actually the descent to my mines and going over the hill, my castle, my pyramids and by taking the mine-cart, you would travel to the sea side and find my sand house by the beach. i was younger than 13 years old and i still have a vivid spatial memory of that place. it was the game i decided to befriend with the nerds of my class. it abstracted me away as some type of drug and boy i had fun with those guys
the firefly isn't mine, i would feel bad capturing or killing animals virtually. would probably ban my own child if they started to kill cows and chickens. WHAT THE FUCK MIKE, YOU AIN'T EVEN PAYING ATTENTION TO THE VERTICAL FARMING PODCAST NOR RESPECTING THE RULES OF THE WORLD. GO TO YOUR BEDROOM AND DON'T EVEN MIND TO BOOT YOUR CYBERDECK!!!!!!!